As you know, God has been leading my heart back to child-like faith and I am so excited. Yesterday, I went out to walk a little around the block. It was a perfect fall day; the breeze was cool and blowing, leaves were on the ground. It was just nice! As I was walking I realized that I had noticed it all! I realized I was experiencing the essence of my faith.....peace, hope, anticipation, and gratitude.

I wrote in my last blog how I have allowed life to take my child-like faith and turn it into more of a job than a relationship. But child-like faith brings us back to that relationship with God that opens our hearts and our minds to Him. With child-like faith, I expect Him again in the everyday. I find I am excited about something, but I am not sure what it is! I feel gratitude for not only my life, but for having God right in the middle of it. But one thing that means so much to me about having this kind of faith, is that I not only love God more truly and openly, but I receive His love so much easier! Without child-like faith, I have so many things crowding my heart and mind. Like I mentioned in my previous blog, I become defensive, doubtful, and sometimes just downright cynical! But as I was walking yesterday, I felt His love for me. I was free to feel good about myself even in an old pair of sweatpants, an over sized shirt, no make-up, and a frizzy pony-tail!! As I was talking to God, my prayers changed. I was more bold in my expectations. I found I wasn't hesitating to ask for things that He says we can have in His Word. I felt I could ask and then rest in knowing that He is God and I am not.

During this talk with God, I thought of so many people who are going through very real pain. I was honest with God and asked Him how we fit those situations in our lives that change us so drastically into child-like faith. I thought of those I know that deal with death of loved ones, tragedy with their children, and other pains and losses that are so devastating. I told God that I just don't see how having child-like faith through that could really be possible. I honestly wondered if this child-like faith was for everyone in everything. Then I truly believe with everything in me that God said YES! But here is what I believe: In the middle of these devastating circumstances, a person cannot get there on their own. During this conversation, God said HE will renew a steadfast spirit in the hearts of these people. I looked up steadfast in Webster's dictionary and this is what it means: not changing or moving; firm in purpose; true. This steadfast spirit comes with a high cost and I can truly see how difficult and painful it would be to get there. However, God is ready to give all that He said He would. Peace that passes all understanding. Healing broken hearts. Binding up wounds. And again, renewing a steadfast spirit within you.

For those going through life not thinking you can return to faith, I believe God is right there with you and waiting. He is not judging you. Instead, He is crying with you and over you. I believe that God is giving us permission to be honest with Him about everything. Honesty about where we are is not a lack of faith, but a cry for more of it.